GLEAMS UNRAVELLED

"The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep"

I dint know how to blaze a trail of my blog. So I have started with my favorite lines of Robin Wood.

And for all the people out there, if you aren’t apprehensive about my blog I m least perturbed. This is my own web page where I can post all the crap I want to, not for you to read wasting your time and whining later telling why do I write stuffs like this. Others move on!

Wanted to blog about “2006 in a glance”. Even jotted down points to be included in it but I was bogged down with yet another thoughts after my New Year celebration. No I was not partying. I celebrated my new year with the kids at KAAKUM KARANGAL orphanage at Thiruvanmiyur. I sought after to write about the orphanage (also old age home) and my time there, how I felt, rather how the inmates of the home felt and ways to improvise. But then again stuck up with my activities. It would be quite a mirth if I said they were related to my academics. Okay. I concede that I was also with some other errands like orkutting (bah!! Jobless am I?? ), Watching movies endlessly on TV and dvds. My dvd player is almost howling. Turning out to be a movie buff!! Right now humming “tere bina” from Guru (after effects of watching that film??)

Now I must also put in the picture what else I did. I have joined as a volunteer in an NGO called “DREAM INDIA2020”. Sounds fine I believe. I am in a few communities in orkut like “chennai social work “, “ help orphans”, etc., (don’t come and ask me if Mother Teresa’s blood is in my veins) and I had started a thread about my new year’s orphanage visit in those communities. The next day I check my inbox, I get a mail from an anonymous person introducing himself as Dream India2020 volunteer and requesting details about the orphanage I visited. I feel elated. To tell more about Dream India, this project mainly is implicated with the upliftment of the rural children. Dream India originated from fervor of a few youngsters and it spread therein across many cities in India and Chennai is no exception in the list. Right now Dream India is associated with helping the rural kids with their education, teaching them basic maths and English. It also helps to provide impetus and encouragement to the needy who are striving hard to live but still manage to study. Most of the volunteers are young college-goers and IT professionals and they aim to make a change. Talking to one of the volunteers, he said he had the inspiration from Dr. Kalam’s vision. A few people from my college are already volunteers and asking them how they got to know about this and their answer was “Orkut”. Now you understand why I was busy orkutting??

For long I had been thinking that orkut is really a waste of time though I was initially engrossed in it. But then in due course of time lost inquisitiveness and suddenly through orkut many things happen. “The real happiness comes from living your life for others”. These are not my words but of Amitabh Bachan’s in the film “BLACK”. And yet another notion from the film “RANG DE BASANTI “ tat youngsters can change the nation. Well I know many of us love these movies and do accept the thoughts so is Dream India, heading towards fulfilling Kalam’s vision with active youngster’s soul as its spirit and making MIGHTY INDIA where “EDUCATION TO ALL” has been achieved.

And now I become conscious that there are
“Miles to go before I sleep
And miles to go before I sleep”

Grooved onto the awe-inspiring music, Here I am after a very long time wit yet another blog of mine. [PJ, especially on your demand :)] I dint know why I have become this bloody sluggish that I don’t even take time to post what I deem about . Myriad of thoughts seem to dwell in my mind these days .. [Hope I am not thrown any exceptions ]
I couldn’t make out what the premise of this write up looks like – philosophical or quite enthusiastic. Or it may even delineate me as a fanatic ..
Thoughts of what I have been doing all these days leave me apprehensive . Spoke to my buddy yesterday after a really long time n talking about my hustle n bustle activities my friend quotes my life to be “SUPER COOL” [!!! ]

Ahem.. I wanted to write about the grandeur of beach[ Bessy rocks big time :)].. The elegant sky which was pink. Wit me n my friends in beach.. on that exquisite evening..[Arrgg.. what happened next.. Now Aish n Rams pls don start scolding me !! ] But then I couldn’t get whatever thing more to write about that…

“ Who cares” ..” i am least bothered ”.. “So what “ .. These phrases are established trademarks of me.. I live in my own world mosta time. I have certain ideologies to what I stick to and I am very much self –opinionated. Its not that I don’t appreciate the opinions of others ..I am compassionate and empathetic . I am always ears . But still I don’t give up myself for the sake of others.
I don’t know if this is what people call “Attitude”.. Or even worse to mark me as “Egoistic”..
Well need I have to concede to it..?? Egoism and Altruism . Egoism - giving up others for self. Altruism - giving up self for others. Good explanation I guess..
Who is not selfish.?? who is not egoistic?? [ I am hunting for people who could give me a NO to the above questions] Man lives on this earth for himself and not for others. So there is nothing wide of the mark in being self centered.

The creator himself was egoistic.. he was self generated ,self motivated..[Read somewhere dude] so ubiquitously comes a “SELF” .. But then this doesn’t unerringly mean that I don’t heed about others..

The very first man invented fire for the very sake that he wanted to bear with the cold. It was his self centered invention for his own wish. But he never bunged with that.. he taught that to his brotherhood and here we lit fire when we want to warm ourselves.. Hats off to the primitive man for being self centered.. So I connote to say that there is nothing without SELF..

So accept everything as it comes.. Everything happens for a reason . Something must happen to realize something else.. It happens with everyone .No one is perfect.
You are born into this world for a purpose.. Realize your worth and set up a goal to find your foot steps well established.. Never let yourself down.. “ BE YOURSELF “

Here goes my nxt poem....

There I watch the ship nearin my reach
When I was sittin in the beach
Millions of questions inside my mind
Walkin in the water is my dream’s rind

The door of happiness instigated
Do dreams come true is still being interrogated
With lotsa questions I was bounded
There I stood confounded

Is it true?? Am I strong??
Answers were perfect in my chutzpah
Couldn figure out the reason for “why”
“I dunno” was all tht I could say n sigh

Time does bring close ones near
And as it took me into my dear
My life’s mysteries were discovered
My wounds were recovered

Dint knw so long tht hearts talk n eyes too…
Up in air drenched in momentous joy
Wish it ne’er ends...with butterflies in my stomach
Rejoicing?? Or was I rejuvenatin??

Still a question mark in some cases,
But, exclamation mark in mosta places!!
I do knw I will get wat I wantd
What I want is wat is with me rite nw

Forever and forever I will cherish
“Everythin happens for a reason”

A silent whisper
A strong prayer
To my love is all me I wish to surrender!!

This is nothing bt my own imagination..virtual character being potrayed here n nothin else!!

He is so so nice..
I keep staring into his eyes
Tats whr my happiness lies..
They made me mad .. I dunno why..
but life is not jus to sigh..
At spring mending time I find him here..
And on a day we meet to walk the line..
Spring is the mischief in me and I wonder
If I cud put a notion in his head..
Myself not least and honor him the most..
Much I haven seen n known bout him..
Gleams that untravelled world ,his eyes still in my mind..
For ever and forever when I move they will ne'er wade..
How dull it is to pause and make an end..
By not making him my friend..
Life piled on life
were all too little and of one to me
to talk with him merely
from eternal silence ..something more
A bringer of new things
A partner in my sorrow's mysteries
for shade to shade will come too drowsily..
And drown the wakeful anguish of the soul..

Chithra is back after a cool trip to Kodaikanal… nice place… ensoyed wit my family…am not gonna write bout the Kodai trip or hw I enjoyed there… this is bout something else…Well, on the way I visited PALANI… I have a strong belief in God.. He is the supreme power above us.. but some things tat happened in the temple really made me feel … Previously people used to climb the mountain stairs in order to reach the top… good God… made people active… But now Rope cars have emerged… When I visited Palani 15 yrs back ,I was a kid then (hey.. even now I am ) , we climbed the stairs to reach the mountain top…This time we dint ‘cos my dad is a heart patient n he couldn’t climb so many stairs… so decided to go by rope car… ouff!! The rush there stunned me… Not even a single soul was climbing stairs at that time… It was not even those sunny afternoons too ..A cool evening where one cud enjoy climbing mountain.. But no one did… People became too lazyyyyy… Times have changed… So have people…
My mom bought the “Archanai plate” .. but it was not useful… the archargar said they don’t do archanai in the evening.. Hmm.. poor we… When the crowd was pushing me forward.., I seriously felt so irritated.. Everyone is gonna see the Lord ,but then y do they hurry like this?? I was happy tat it wasn’t any special day.. or else I would have been crushed in the crowd… know what… I cud get only glimpse of Lord Muruga.. The person there was pushing the people.. Jus a second, then u r pushed out of the place.. And for all this we have been standing for hours there ?? this is not new.. it happens in Thirupathi too…
The worst thing ever.. Archagars have started their own business.. He said give me 15 I will give u prasadham… Yea he gave me only kumkum,viboothi n three petals of a flower… people who are to serve God have made it a business… I was so much upset over this… came out n there was another god’s temple… since we dint do archanai earlier we did it here.. n what.. here too the same business… For breaking the coconut , the archagar asked 10 rs .. He ne’er said tat initially ,but only at the end he asked for it.. 10 rs or 15 rs is not a big matter at all.. but the way they gain this is really bad.. Announcement goes in the mike tat don give money to outsiders who claim to do pooja for u.. but it all happens within…inside itself…by the archagars.. what is the solution to all these??
Then came the Golden Chariot .. Aha.. To pull it one has to pay rs.2000 ..
Too much I say… And the crowd for watching this is more than that.. People pushing each other to watch the chariot .. They keep on going behind the chariot.. Hey ..what ..only God’s idol was there.. see it once n pray…isn’t that enough?? Why shud one push everyone n keep on going behind the chariot…
So many questions left unanswered… People’s attitude must change.. We go to temple for peace of mind.. But really there is no peace in such a place.. Only chaos n confusions.. Some thing must be done for all these.. I don’t know what could be done.. but things need a change…